Why didn't they tell us?

We go through life, minding our own business, and suddenly, surprisingly, we're old. We've had a lifetime to prepare, and yet when we get there we're gobsmacked. But of course when we were young, we didn't want to think about it. Here are some of the things I wish I'd known about old age:

• We don't realize we're old. After all, we've never been old before. We don't see much change from day to day. Then comes the fall, the cruel offhand comment, the bad diagnosis, and we're in shock. How could this be happening to me?
• Everyone gets some darn thing. Someone has a fall, another a hip replacement, another suffers through breast cancer. Pretty much everyone you know has gone through something major. Look around the changeroom at aquafitness: it's like a veterans' reunion.
• Our skin goes off duty. It sags, it dries out, it wrinkles, it can't fight off the sun. Age spots go rogue. We can't open the produce bags at the grocery store.
• Our feet betray us. We get fallen arches, bunions, cross-over toes, a lifetime of wearing high heels and pointed toes coming home to roost. We don't feel like walking much any more, then we can't walk much any more. Fight this one as hard as you can, or life will shrink down to a couple of rooms and a phone.
• Our vision goes murky. We can't read street signs, crossword puzzle clues, computer screens. We fumble and cuss until it's finally bad enough to go for cataract surgery. At least this is one condition that can be fixed.
• We feel vulnerable. We cast our eyes down on the ground as we walk, afraid of tripping over that mound of tar. We mislay our keys and wonder if it's the first sign of dementia. We worry about being targeted by con artists and muggers. We stay home after dark.
• Everyone thinks we're stupid. Store clerks appear out of nowhere to ask if we need help. Government officials repeat their instructions slowly and loudly, a few times over. Frankly, I'm grateful for the help. Try to cultivate a benign, slightly bewildered look. You'll never get lost in Canadian Tire again.
• We don't run the world any more. Another generation is in charge now, with different values, different goals. And most of them don't much care what superannuated old codgers have to say.
• The culture leaves us behind. Technology, fashion, entertainment - everything targets the young. Even if we have money, they don't seem to want it. With so many familiar signposts gone, it's easy to feel lonely and alienated, out of place in the world.
• We live more and more inside our heads. Our energy flags, we're not up for adventures. But we have the time and experience to think, richly and deeply; to perceive historical patterns; to evaluate what we see and hear. It's actually a great time to learn new things. One of the few perks of old age!